Licking the Bottom of the Love Jar
by Jared Woods
You don’t want to know what a love jar is.
Nobody will ever tell you what a love jar is.
Love! Love lost. Love gained. Romance. Sexual tension. Secure relationships. Reckless marriages. Accidental children. Boring families. Divorce. Death. It’s funny until it’s not. It’s a horror most of the time. Love is disgusting, regardless.
What’s at the bottom of the love jar? Twenty writings that ask the important questions, such as:
Can a snake and a rabbit overcome the obstacles of their forbidden love?
Can the boy get the girl even when incapacitated by depression?
Can the power of two siblings single-handedly defeat climate change?
Can a couple survive the loss of their child while stranded on a foreign planet?
Can you overpower a witch using beer alone?
Can we prevent contagious diseases while our cat insists on tonguing its rectum?
Can you even tolerate poetry?
Suppose you enjoy the dark surrealism of Franz Kafka’s existentialism, the peculiar imagination of Roald Dahl’s whimsy, or the allegorical terror of George Orwell’s satire. In that case, you’ll adore Licking the Bottom of the Love Jar. It is Jared Woods’ seventh publication, but he is best known as the former writer for the YouTube channel Pencilmation, where some of his episodes have reached over 100 million views.
Buy the book now! But be warned: you’ll never find out what the love jar is. We’re not joking.
5 out of 5 fairies
This was a fascinating collection of short stories, and might not be what you’re expecting, in a good way. I may not know what a love jar is, but I do know I loved these stories. Different people, different kinds of love, different obstacles to overcome. From prejudice to depression to magic, these stories are varied but captivating. Woods did an amazing job of bringing each character to life, and I was impressed with how much emotion was conveyed within each short story. If you enjoy your fiction a little odd, and love reading about love, you’ll want to grab this one!
Born in South Africa and now homeless as a nomadic something or other, Jared Woods does whatever he wants. He is best known as the former scriptwriter for the YouTube channel Pencilmation, where billions of people have seen his work with scripts surpassing the 100 million mark. He has authored numerous books, including the spiritual philosophy of the “Janthopoyism Bible”, the self-help publication “Heartbreak Sucks!”, the fictional novel “This Is Your Brain On Drugs” and a music journalism piece “F**ked My Way Up to the Top: The Complete Biography of Lana Del Rey”.
His other creative projects include #legobiscuits (a daily one-panel Instagram comic), composing solo music under the name Coming Down Happy, “singing” for the band Sectlinefor, and producing a film called Definitely Not a Cry For Help, which is already partially on YouTube.
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