“For weeks Ryan has been feeling fatigued, dizzy, and confused. The doctors say it’s just the flu, but for some reason, his mom isn’t convinced. It’s hard to blame her; he’s been sleeping so often lately that Awesome Waters, the world of his dreams, has become more real than the one in which he lives. Yet, even Awesome Waters isn’t the cheerful escape it once was. Ominous clouds have taken over the luminous skies of his imaginary theme park, ushering in a masked, sinister ringmaster who’s dead set on rendering Awesome Waters to ashes.
Back in reality, Ryan finds himself in a hospital, where he and his family receive a far graver diagnosis than the simple flu—cancer. Ryan has T-cell leukemia. Mom, Dad, his brother, and Grandma: they all do their best to help him through the chemotherapy and operations. But despite their love, Ryan’s light begins to flicker. The ringmaster explains how he will fall entirely into that darkness unless Ryan can solve the mystery of the ringmaster’s appearance. If Ryan can before time runs out, then the strength to fight for his future will be his to command.”
It might not make sense to some that I had darkness to overcome in the first place. After all, I survived–right? I wish that were enough, but to be honest, it never was. Ever since I entered remission, I had been searching for a reason to substantiate why I survived in the first place. So many others fell (many friends), so why me? What made me so special? After rewrite three (or was it four?) I found my answer. I realized there was no one true meaning to life–only whatever we ascribe to it. And when the clock stops for me, I can only hope I made a difference in someone’s life through my writing.
I know how hard each of our journeys are. All of us struggle. All of us fight an invisible war no one else will ever know. But you’re not alone. That’s the message I hope readers will take away from this novel. If I can get that through to even one person; inspire even one reader to not give up, then the two years of tears and nightmare was worth it. If not, then at the very least, I hope the read was enjoyable.
In closing, writing this novel has meant everything to me. Through sharing it, each reader has helped me to heal. From the bottom of my heart, I thank you.
Sincerely,
Ryan Olson
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We are (slowly) working on updating old posts to the new format and removing old tour/blitz posts that are now missing key assets – please be patient with us, there are a lot of posts to go through, we’ve been doing this since 2016! Any tour/blitz posts that contained a review and are now missing key assets will be updated to review posts so the reviews remain accessible
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We’re doing our best to get everything up on the site and social media in a timely manner. Apologies if anything is missed or late! Between the state of the US right now, mental/physical health problems, and some things going on in our personal lives, things may be missed or late occasionally. We truly appreciate your understanding! Feel free to reach out to Lily if you notice something missing.
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Mental Health Resources for those in the USA – In light of the recent election, we want to put out a message that LGBTQIA+ and minorities are always welcome here. We may post promos in conjunction with tour companies that spout worldviews we don’t always agree with, but we do our best to avoid any openly phobic posts, and should you notice any, we’d appreciate you contacting us with this form to let us know.
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